Things I’m Thankful For, Part 1

To celebrate Thanksgiving, I wrote this post about things I wasn’t thankful for. To celebrate . . . nothing really, I’ve decided to write about things I am thankful for.

Before you read it, there are 3 things you should know. One, I won’t be mentioning my family or any truly special moments. I’m thankful every day for all that I have, but those things aren’t that funny. Two, this blog is no way meaningful. It won’t guide you to eternal happiness or change your life in any way. (Unless it guides you to eternal happiness – but that means that there is probably something seriously wrong with you.) Three, I really am thankful for all these things. Don’t think that I made these up just to be funny (note: this might not be an issue for you anyway) because I didn’t. That being said, if you do find anything funny, feel free to laugh. But in a reflective way, as if to ask yourself, “Why am I laughing at what someone is thankful for?”

10. Marcie from Peanuts

There’s something about good old Marcie that I really identify with. Maybe it’s the fact that she wears glasses for her non-existent eyes. Or maybe it’s that she stays loyal to Peppermint Patty and calls her “sir” in a clearly one-sided relationship. Actually, those aren’t the reasons because a) I have eyes and b) I never had a Peppermint Patty in my life that I can remember, nor do I call any of my female friends “sir.” I like her because she’s unlike every other character in the Peanuts series. She’s not mean (like most of the female characters), she’s not needy (like most of the male characters that actually matter), she’s not selfish (like Snoopy), and she appears to be smart (unlike pretty much everyone but Linus, Lucy, and Snoopy. And maybe Schroeder). 

She’s just . . . Marcie. Eyeless wonder that she is.

9. Llamas

From the fluffy hair on top of their heads, to their ridiculously large teeth, to the fact that every llama I’ve ever encountered has been rather ornery, I am very thankful for llamas. But you know what I’m most thankful for? The fact that their name starts with two “l’s.” On a related note, you might think that I would want one as a pet. You would be mistaken though. I would want a yak.

8. OCP in the fridge

An Oatmeal Creme Pie that has been chilling in the fridge for several hours is one of the tastiest things that you could ever eat. And one of the most dangerous. One time, I put a brand-new box of a dozen OCPs in the fridge, and somehow we were down to three by the end of the day. Yep, you did the math right. I ate 9. In a DAY.

7.  That one time that I was really trying to avoid someone when I went to pick Chloe up and that person happened to be in the one place that I knew they wouldn’t be and it was just the two of us because no one else was down there.

I think the title really explains that one.  But why am I thankful it happened? Because the long version makes a great and awkward story.

6. Tiny socks

I don’t like long socks. I’ve always felt that they were slowly creeping up my leg to do . . . whatever long socks that creep up your legs do. Medium socks have always been annoying because they don’t always stay up. So I’m constantly pulling them up. And if they haven’t fallen down, I feel like they will be falling shortly, so I can’t relax. Then we have ankle socks, and I feel like they just didn’t work hard enough to become the best type of sock ever: tiny socks (the official term is “no-show” socks). They have only two jobs: to cover your feet and to not be seen, both of which they do very well. I wear them all year round, even on the coldest days of our Wisconsin winters. Why? Because they transcend weather. They transcend everything. And yes, my ankles do get cold – but it’s not the tiny socks’ fault. It’s the temperature.

Well, that’s Part 1. Coming next week: Things I’m Thankful For, Part 2.